The Big Three

Three behaviours we exhibit that diminish our influence and prevent us from achieving our desired outcomes.

Today, I want to delve into something that affects us all: the way we navigate challenging conversations. You see, we exhibit four common behaviours when faced with moments of discomfort or conflict. While three of these behaviours hinder our influence and prevent us from achieving our desired outcomes, one leads us to the utopia of amazing communication and influence: responding.

Let's break it down.

Run

The first behaviour we often default to is avoidance. We run away from the conversation, hoping to escape the discomfort and uncertainty of its outcome. But here's the catch: avoiding the conversation doesn't make the issue disappear; it only allows it to fester and grow.

Reconcile

Next, we have reconciliation. We accept that nothing will change, resigning ourselves to putting up and shutting up. Initially, this might seem like the easy way out, but in reality, it only perpetuates dissatisfaction and prevents us from reaching our full potential. The reality is that if you don't talk it out—and the sooner, the better—you act it out, and it grows like a disease.

Rectify

Then there's rectification. We attempt to fix the issue by shifting it elsewhere or implementing quick fixes that don't address the root cause. This approach often involves forceful tactics like anger or control, leading to temporary solutions that fail to create lasting change.

Respond

But here's where the magic happens: responding. Instead of running, reconciling, or rectifying, we learn to respond in a way that fosters shared understanding and meaningful change. Responding requires us to engage with empathy and connection, allowing us to influence behaviour positively and sustainably.

That's why I created the Confident Conversations course—to equip individuals with the skills to respond effectively in challenging situations. When we master the art of responding, our influence skyrockets, and we create spaces for others to thrive as their best selves.

So, let's strive to do less of the running, reconciling, and rectifying and more of the responding—the truly amazing response that leads to transformation and growth.

I hope you found this insight helpful.

If you're interested in learning more about that and how to be more responsive in those high-stress, emotional, controversial moments, jump on the webinar and check out the information about the course. My webinar is called How to De-escalate Difficult Dialogue with Ease without Making Matters Worse or Wrecking the Relationship. So it's a little about how we respond rather than the run, reconcile and rectify, so if you're keen, you can check it out, and I hope to see you there.

If you intended to come but missed the chance, you can catch it here with a replay.

This is a *must-attend* if:

• You want to know how to have more control when conversations don't go as expected.

• You’re tired of dealing with tense situations that become bigger than they need to. Those interactions leave me feeling drained and frustrated.

• You want to know more about how I can speak up about challenging things and still keep the relationship in tact.

• You’re feeling overwhelmed and exhausted by constantly being in reactive mode, tackling one problem after another. It's emotionally draining to spend your days fighting fires.

• You’re thinking there has got to be a better way.

If you’re willing to invest just 60 minutes to get FULLY up to speed on the most powerful “what’s working now” to De-Escalate Defensive Dialogue..

I promise to reward your energy with only the latest and most effective strategies that will have you eliminating stress and taking control of the issues that keep showing up.

Cool?

Can’t wait to see you on the masterclass!